The last few months (six now I think Covid has been the topic of conversation). To start of not seeing Josh was a bit of a novelty!
I felt shitty for enjoying my space. 😦
Not having to clean his teeth, organise meals for 5 pm, listening to karaoke, listening to hours of his babble, things I had to do when he came to stay for a week. I have never thought that before.
However as the months grew longer- that enjoyment I ‘d felt from not having to do these tasks- grew into a longing to just see him. to hug him.
So here we are 6 months down the lane, heading towards some sort of event. So people tell me. Another Covid disaster. Josh has been to stay for two weekends were we are in his bubble.
Not just a visit for 30 minutes, where we couldn’t touch, not get close to him. Sitting outside 2 metres apart on his birthday- it was a strange day. The presents had been dropped off a few days beforehand, Some brought out for him to open in front of us. I had brought them all- but feigned surprise when he opened them!!
My job in the past, always to sort his bookcase, place his new discs in the over flowing heavy cases. (Julian always saying I shouldn’t get on my knees to sort out his bookcase, or trying to tidy his wardrobe) ( he worried about me, probably quite rightly). Anyway we just rolled up, and went home. Leaving these tasks for someone else to arrange to sort out- it felt invigorating,- my place was taken.
But as the months passed by- all I wanted was a proper hug. And after such a long time he was allowed back here. We could have as many hugs as felt natural. he started reading me his books at night time. After 31 years we have found a new trick.
He reads ‘Postman Pat’, ‘The Wombles Boating Accident’, ‘Burglar Bill’ to me, & I love it. I never knew the stories- its great fun choosing a book- learning what he’s been listening on his headphones to for years.
We talk a lot more. He still watches a lot of taped programs, but I look forward to the few days together.